Tuesday, 10 April 2007

Still Good Times!

How long will my good mood last? Today has been a struggle. My work doesn't stimulate me. I don't ask or expect it to so normally this isn't a problem but today it's really bothering me. I think it's because I've been having such good weekends that the Monday comedown is more pronounced than normal. Actually it's Tuesday, Easter Monday was a Bank Holiday and I did nothing but stay at home and relax after a tiring few days.

I went to stay with Alex on Friday. It seems impossible that I could ever go there and not have the most fun. Every time. Everyone there is completely lovely and I laugh so much that my sides often hurt the next day. My entire body hurt on Saturday but that was more due to the late night and early rise coupled with sleep on a sofa. I can't wait to get back there this weekend

Sunday was spent in Windsor with Lisa and some of her friends. Windsor's a fantastic place to spend summer days. It wasn't quite summer weather on Sunday but it was close enough to sit outside and let time quietly pass. It was another very enjoyable day.

Returning to the question posed in the first sentence: For at least a little while yet. At some point I need to acknowledge that much of life is passing me by and that wasting my days doing a job that means nothing to me or anyone else is unacceptable. I have no great desire to change the World. I just want to do something that I feel I'm suited to, something that makes me feel useful, in a place I feel I belong. But where is that place? I have never, at any point in my life, really known the answer to that question. But it's out there for me somewhere, as it is for everyone, and I'll keep on looking for as long as it takes. And in the meantime I'll continue to face each day with a smile.

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